Understanding Desire: Create a Specifically Abstract Picture
Is our destiny within our control? Can individuals truly attain what they desire? While such questions have occupied philosophers for centuries, contemporary behavioral sciences offer a compelling lens through which to examine them. The answer, I believe, is yes — but only if we understand what we truly want and why.
The greatest challenge lies not in the pursuit of our goals but in discerning their authenticity. Frequently, we aspire to outcomes that appear desirable yet fail to satisfy us once achieved. This misalignment arises because our perceived wants are often shaped by external influences — societal expectations, comparison, or emotional biases — rather than intrinsic motivation. In behavioral economics, this phenomenon is described as preference inconsistency, where individuals’ choices fluctuate with context, emotion, and time. As a result, we may pursue objectives that do not align with our enduring values or well-being.
This recognition has profound implications for mental and emotional health. When individuals continually strive toward goals that are not congruent with their deeper needs, they experience cognitive dissonance, frustration, and a diminished sense of purpose. Conversely, developing self-awareness about our motivations — questioning “Do I truly want this?” and “Why do I want this?” — can foster psychological resilience and clarity. In this sense, behavioral insight becomes a tool for emotional regulation and existential alignment.
For instance, when one aspires to attend a particular university or find love in a specific person, the underlying desire may not concern the institution or the individual themselves, but rather the qualities associated with them — belonging, recognition, affection, or stability. What we pursue, therefore, is rarely the object itself but the emotional state it symbolizes. Recognizing this distinction allows us to redirect our efforts toward experiences and environments that genuinely nurture our well-being.
This reflection emerged as I contemplated a loved one’s life journey. Their struggles with identifying what they truly wanted revealed to me how central self-knowledge is to fulfillment. Even my own decisions — such as those related to education and career — have been influenced by observing this process of trial, error, and eventual clarity. This experience underscores a universal truth: that the absence of self-understanding can lead even the most intelligent minds into cycles of dissatisfaction.
Ultimately, the integration of behavioral economics, philosophy, and health suggests that clarity of desire is a critical determinant of both success and emotional balance. When intentions align with intrinsic motivations — when our actions reflect not external expectations but internal truths — the psychological friction between thought and behavior dissipates. What remains is flow: a state where purpose, action, and meaning coexist harmoniously.
In this alignment lies not merely achievement, but well-being — the realization that to understand what we truly want is, in essence, to understand ourselves.
On Trust, Contradiction, and the Art of Beginning Again
It is only natural to wallow from time to time. Why is this happening to me? It can feel as though you’ve fallen into a hollow, lightless space — where even the idea of hope feels out of reach. In those moments, the world appears devoid of color. But what if, instead of forcing yourself to climb out, you paused and noticed?
Look around — even in the midst of despair, there are small anchors of warmth: a memory that makes you smile, a song that carries you somewhere softer, a quiet reminder of love. Even a single spark of joy matters, because emotions, much like investments, compound over time. From a behavioral economics perspective, our minds tend to overweigh loss — a phenomenon known as loss aversion. When life feels heavy, pain demands more of our attention than joy does. But by consciously seeking even the smallest positive cues, we begin to rebalance our internal economy — shifting the focus from scarcity to abundance.
In health, this shift has profound consequences. Gratitude and emotional openness activate neural pathways associated with resilience and healing. When we allow ourselves to experience both pain and beauty, we regulate our nervous systems, gently restoring equilibrium. The body, after all, listens to the stories we tell ourselves.
Philosophically, life is a paradox — every joy is born alongside sorrow, every success coexists with failure. The universe thrives on dualities; the contrast is what gives existence its depth. To live fully is to accept these contradictions — not to erase pain, but to make space for it alongside wonder.
Openness and trust become vital acts of courage. They demand a return to childlike curiosity — to approach each experience as though it were your first. This beginner’s mindset is not naïveté; it’s the wisdom of knowing that every moment holds the potential for renewal.
The question, then, is simple yet profound: Do you want to live a life full of experiences?
If the answer is yes, then choose to trust — to remain open, even when it hurts. Because where there is sadness, there will one day be joy; and where there is darkness, light is already learning how to find you.
Understanding Hearts: The Origins of Self
One of the most profound acts of self-discovery is understanding the hearts of our parents. Why does it matter so deeply? Because in many ways, our emotional and behavioral foundations are shaped by the unseen architecture of their choices, fears, and dreams. Without understanding their inner worlds, it becomes difficult to truly understand our own.
From a behavioral lens, our decisions are rarely made in isolation — they are anchored in the emotional economies we inherit. The way we love, fear, or trust mirrors the patterns we observed long before we could name them. In health, too, this connection runs deep: our emotional well-being often depends on how we reconcile with the narratives we’ve internalized from them — the stories of strength, silence, sacrifice, and affection.
In the painting above, I tried to visualize how I perceive my parents’ hearts. My mother feels everything in vivid hues — love, anger, pain, care, disappointment, and joy coexist in full intensity. Our relationship has been layered and complex, yet my journey to understand her has taught me the essence of emotional regulation, empathy, and forgiveness — the very foundations of psychological resilience.
My father, on the other hand, embodies innocence and purity. There’s an innocence to his being — a childlike purity that connects deeply with the philosophical idea of the “unconditioned self.” Our bond feels spiritual, beyond logic or language — perhaps a reminder that love, at its purest, transcends form and expectation.
Together, their hearts form the palette through which I interpret life. I’ve come to see that we are not merely extensions of our parents — we are reflections refracted through the prism of our understanding. Each effort to empathize with them brings us closer to coherence — a sense of wholeness that heals and harmonizes both mind and spirit.
Every individual is blessed with something unique; for me, it’s my parents. I find myself falling in love with them more each day — not because they’re perfect, but because they are the truest colors of my being.
The Fire Within: Listening to What Moves You
There’s something that lights each of us up — a quiet flame that makes our hearts race and our minds focus, no matter how chaotic life gets. It may not announce itself loudly; it often reveals itself in small moments — when you lose track of time doing something that feels effortlessly you.
In behavioral economics, we call this the pull of intrinsic motivation — the inner reward that drives us to act even without external gain. It’s why some of us fight harder for a cause, a craft, or a connection. These impulses, often dismissed as “preferences,” are actually powerful insights into our sense of purpose. They tell us what we value when no one is watching.
Purpose, like health, is not a destination — it’s a form of alignment. When what you do, think, and feel begin to move in the same direction, you find an internal equilibrium that nourishes you from within. Modern research even shows that people who live with a sense of meaning experience better mental and physical health — less stress, more resilience, and a deeper sense of fulfillment.
Philosophically, purpose asks us to look beyond outcomes and into why we care. It reminds us that caring is not weakness; it’s wisdom. To care deeply is to choose to be affected by the world — to allow yourself to be moved, even when it hurts.
Maybe the path to finding your purpose isn’t about searching, but listening — noticing what ignites you and following that energy wherever it leads. The things you are willing to fight harder for are not accidents; they are signposts guiding you home.
In a world that constantly measures success by visible results, ‘Live it through colours’ reminds us that the most meaningful transformations often happen within — where our desires, thoughts, and actions converge in quiet harmony.